Posted by Offer Tsuriel on October 30, 2009
It has come to our attention that you who don’t go to an office every day do not adhere to an enforceable dress code.
Granted, many of you bailed out of the 9-tO-S world to escape suits and ties. But how can you expect clients and the wider world to take you seriously if you don’t dress for success? Wouldn’t you feel more professional if you followed a basic dress code?
Me here at headquarters have drafted a proposed dress code for those who never leave their homes to perform their valuable work functions. I will conduct an open comment period during which we’ll seek your input. Then, without warning, the following requirements will become mandatory:
- Pajamas are not proper office attire. Ditto for bathrobes.
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Posted by Offer Tsuriel on October 23, 2009
Comrades:
As you know, we’ve made terrific progress in capturing the market of people who work out of their homes. This growing market
of suckers has resulted in booming sales at our 236 ,405 huge retail warehouses nationwide.
To remain competitive, however, we must always be on the lookout for new ways to persuade America’s workers to buy doodads for their home offices. We must convince these workers
they need our products. This post will outline some possible strategies. Me here in Marketing thought I’d run them up the flagpole and see who bends over. I look forward to
your input.
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Posted by Offer Tsuriel on October 7, 2009
I have chattering teeth on my desk. Not just your standard, plastic, chattering teeth. These have big, pink feet attached. The whole thing hops around while the teeth chatter. Worth a smile the first thirty times I saw it. After that, I tried to ignore the little gizmo, which sent me telepathic signals all day: “Wind me up. C ‘mon, it’ll be fun .”
Where did this laugh riot come from? I have no idea. I assume one of my sons set it here, then forgot it.
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